"Well howdy, boys and girls!"

Looks like ol' Bunkhouse Bob is here again to share a few tips from

The Department of "Hey, That's Good To Know!"

When the expiration date on your yogurt states February 5th,

it does NOT mean February 6th.

A squirrel dropping a walnut on your roof at midnight sounds exactly like

an insane asylum escapee trying to get the screen off your bedroom window.

The blue liquid in your Lava Lamp

does not taste like Jammin' Berry Kool-Ade.

Hey, good to know.

Be sure and stop by the ol' bunkhouse again sometime--
maybe, if we're lucky, we can catch Bob's tip for drying socks with
a Zippo lighter and a fondue fork.

Happy Trails!

(c)g.Slater
clip art courtesy Hasslefreeclipart.com

"Yes, it's song time again, readers!"

This one goes out to everyone wearing a patch, chewing Nicorette gum, and eating lots of carrot sticks.

When you get the urge to light up, vocalize instead.

Sing it loud! Sing it proud!

I want you all around for a long, long time.

Jenny's Anthem

sung to the tune of Born Free

http://www.internetbolaget.se/~tradare/mid/mid.html

Smoke-free, as free as the wind blows
There’s new hair in your nose
Smoke-free, just might save your heart

Smoke-free, no blue haze surrounds you
Can’t let the ol’ monkey hound you
Each time you get in your car

Stay free, where no doctors chide you
You’re free as the roaring tide
No need to “step outside”.

Smoke-free, and life is worth living
The commercials weren’t kidding
Now you’re Smoke-free!

(c)g.Slater

clip art courtesy Rewind the Fifties

Menopause?
There should be laws
To protect the innocent.
One thought comes, another goes.
I don't know where it went.

They say I will get over this.
The experts tell me so.
Now what was I just saying?
Well, shoot, I just don't know.



I've provided the tune thanks to MFiles.co.uk, and of course, Mr. Dvorak, may he rest in peace, and his New World Symphony.
Feel free to repeat the first 5 lines as the chorus. >>
http://www.mfiles.co.uk/midi-files.htm

Your sister in arms,
Gloria

(c)g.Slater
pub.dom. photo