And Now, This Message From Our Sponsors

Your car develops an irksome clunk when rounding corners. You make an appointment with a new repair shop on the other side of town. The desk person says they can fit you in on Thursday. You arrive to find that Chris, your new mechanic is not the greasy-nailed, wrench-wrangling male you expected. “He”… is a Labrador retriever.

Uh-oh! Embarrassing paradigm shift!

How many times has this happened to you? Too many to count, right?

Or, you’re out with the girls for a day on the town. You offer to pay for lunch. When the waiter comes with the check, you hand him your credit card. He tells you, “Sorry, Mam, we only accept scrapbooking stickers.”

Uh-oh! Paradigm shift!

But now, thanks to New Paradigm Shift Shields ™, you need never be embarrassed again.

That’s right, simply apply one of our patented absorbent shields to your forehead with the self-stick backing and feel sure all day. *

Comes in a variety of skin tones. Available in sizes to fit all levels of confusion from Mildy Befuddled to I Thought This Was Akron But Now I Just Don’t Know.

So, remember, New Paradigm Shift Shields ™ the next time the rug of popular belief is yanked out from under you. And never be embarrassed again.

Warning: May cause dizziness, forehead rash, headache, nausea, memory loss, hair loss, job loss, memory loss, and delusions of grandeur.

*Disclaimer: The Paradigm Shift Shield Company has no idea how this product works.
But the next time someone tells you Anjolina Jolie’s lips look totally normal, you’ll be awfully glad it does.
The PSS Co.


©g.Slater 2006
graphic courtesy Rewind the Fifties